A few “would you rather”s for parents


Just wondering…

1. Would you rather take your children with you to the grocery store or volunteer for an electroshock treatment trial?

2. Would you rather rummage through your child’s closet looking for his missing soccer shirt or eat the science experiment that’s growing in the rear recesses of the fridge?

3. Would you rather talk your children into giving away their ancient, unused PlayStation or run the darn thing over with your car “by accident?”

4. Would you rather have 2 cents for every sock you pick up off the floor or a dollar for every shoe you pick up off the floor?

5. Would you rather your children spend a day without talking or a year without listening?



  1. Monica said,

    September 16, 2009 at 11:03 am

    Fun questions…I’ll take a stab at answering some. 🙂

    1.- I think I’d take my kids to the grocery store….not the easiest of tasks, but I’ve learned to ignore and let them run around the store to get out their energy. I’m not sure how the other shoppers feel about it, but I’m not sweating the small stuff. 🙂 he he.
    2. Definetly try to find the soccer shirt…there are many experiments in the back of my fridge and I know that I’ve found red/pink colored growths on some which I do know as a past clean room tech. spell major trouble.
    3. This is a tough one…I’m thinking I’d talk to them about it and then if they don’t want to get rid of it, I’d do the nasty thing of making it disappear to Goodwill. Kind of like I’ve done with other toys since school started. 🙂
    4. 2 cents per sock is decent….since I’ve trained them to put shoes away.
    5. That is extremely difficult to answer. In an ideal world, if I had to choose I’d go with a day without talking since a whole year without listening is much longer. My kids talk a fair amount…I love to hear what they say though (there are exceptions though). 🙂

  2. scheirmad said,

    September 16, 2009 at 11:42 am

    Hmmm…some things to consider:

    1. Some days it depends on the wattage of the electroshock. I think I can manage the grocery store OK, but shopping for shoes is a nightmare–in that case I’d take the shock set at 11.

    2. Ever since I found a jar of marshmallow fluff under Hayley’s bed, I’ve realized that you never know where the next pandemic superbug will originate.

    3. I don’t have the heart to make things “disappear.” Tried it once, and one of them spotted a favorite old stuffed animal, stiff and eyes open, stuffed in a plastic garbage bag. Black bags…good.

    4. Perhaps I will consider some kind of training as well. Maybe then I can just ring this bell and the shoes will magically vanish….

    5. I think we’ve already logged several years without the kids listening. What now? :-/

  3. Cr@ig said,

    September 16, 2009 at 1:17 pm

    Where can you redeem the several years of not listening that we’ve already accumulated for the quiet days that they are more than worth!?

    • scheirmad said,

      September 16, 2009 at 1:56 pm

      Those days [years] are gone forever, Craig. You should just let ’em go.

      • Cr@ig said,

        September 16, 2009 at 4:16 pm

        That and Fed losing the US Open?! I can’t handle both at the same time!

  4. scheirmad said,

    September 16, 2009 at 6:25 pm

    Craig —

    Fed will go on, as will you. Me though, I may never recover from that horrendous bathroom color!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do you think Fed’s bathroom is red and black…like Billy Idol’s?

    • Cr@ig said,

      September 17, 2009 at 12:06 pm

      I think Fed’s towels are Red and Black with the styilized “RF” monogram on each one. Or maybe they say “RFs” and “Hers”.

      ¿Que color es el cuarto de Baño de Del Potro? – ¿Perhapsamente Tennis court azul?


      • scheirmad said,

        September 17, 2009 at 2:56 pm

        What about black like that guy Guillermo Vilas’s hair? Glossy!

  5. scheirmad said,

    September 17, 2009 at 9:12 am

    By the way, sock pick-up earnings for today are 8 cents; shoes: $1.

  6. Andie said,

    September 18, 2009 at 11:42 am

    1. electroshock–they say it makes you feel better
    2. look for the shirt–although just today I discovered I may have survived eating a science experiment
    3. Will running Bob’s ancient playstation and other dinosaur electronics be convincingly viewed as an accident? Just askin’…
    4. RU kidding? the shoes. I’d earn more per hour than I do medical writing. Now if it was socks I found cleaning out the couch…score!
    5. Year without listening. Why fight it?

    Aaron keeps posing this “what if”: would you rather kiss the world’s stinkiest toe or wrestle a shark? I always go with the toe.

  7. scheirmad said,

    September 18, 2009 at 2:13 pm

    I’m liking your radical honesty, Ann!

    And I’m thinking if you hit it just right, you might damage the car running over the old electronics and make some insurance money off of it. It’s worth a try!

    I’m going out on a limb on this one now: I’d wrestle the shark. Especially if he’s really small. And has no teeth.

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